The original Sausage-Fest cast in 2003.

The basic premise of Sausage-Fest is to satirize and spoof every single aspect of college living, and -- to some extent -- life itself. Yes, that may sound a bit cliched and the idea has been done before, but Sausage-Fest offers something a little bit different... its wide and ever-growing array of wacky and stereotypical characters. Although the comic is driven by an ensemble cast, the main character (so to speak) is Chris Philbert Copeland. As a freshman who’s unaware of life outside his one-horse suburban town and his loving parents’ house, he comes to college oblivious and uncorrupted by a campus that is, in itself, a microcosmic world. In his journey to find himself and ultimately get a Bio-Mathematical Poli-English degree, Chris -- accompanied by a noseless music snob, a shaggy-haired stoner, a rebel with a penchant for smoking and swearing, and a best friend who keeps on getting killed and reincarnated -- encounters the likes of giant killer robots, evil talking ducks, sexy goths, and drunken frat boys. Unbeknowst to all of them, the Sausage-Fest cast is overlooked by a pint-sized devil and angel whose own misadventures create trouble for everyone. With an entire campus full of colorful characters behind him, Chris may just have what it takes to survive the transition from childhood to adulthood.

Sausage-Fest is a collegiate comic that is written, drawn, and allegedly illegally distributed by artist extraordinaire, Phillip "King Radical" Retuta. The comic is based at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, Phillip’s school, and ran in the Daily Illini from the Fall of 2003 to the Winter of 2006. After torrid love affair after torrid love affair with several newspaper staff members and publishing the ill-begotten "The Adventures of the Nazi-Amazon Housewife and Her Life Partner, Muslim Jesus" storyline, Phillip decided to take his creativity and talent to the so-called "inter-web" and develop a "webbed page" for his comic.

As for the acclaimed author himself, Phillip Retuta -- born Reginald Saffron Phillipski -- lived a luscious and decadent lifestyle. Despite his extravagant and hedonistic adult years, not everything was so fine and dandy for a young, bright-eyed, and astonishingly beautiful Phillip. Raised in the slums of DuPage County, Illinois by two lesbian schoolmarms, a young Phillip suffered from frequent bouts of black lung; in order to support his parents’ ether addiction, the child had to earn money by cleaning out the smoke stacks in Chicago’s old meat-packing district. Tired of coughing up ebony-colored phlegm at the end of each exhausting day, Phillip -- before he even reached the ever-so awkward stage of puberty -- decided to enlist in the United States Army.

In 1945, while his fellow comrades were storming the beaches of Normandy, a 21-year-old Phillip was in Connecticut entertaining homebound soldiers as chief coordinator for the USO. Losing his arm in a tragic rendition of "The Colored Folk Want Some Service Here," Phillip came back to Illinois and briefly worked as a sideshow, freak act. Touring with a traveling circus, Phillip was known as "Hograd, the One Armed Ape Man." There, he met his first wife, Cochella "The Cycloptic Mermaid" Sherman. The two would produce three of his 23 children -- 14 of whom are illegitimate.

In the mid to late sixties, he became a trendsetting fashion icon by reintroducing 19th-century muttonchops to the public. Blinded by fame, fortune, and the occasional hit of opium-laced acid, Phillip left his one-eyed, fishwoman wife and moved to New York City. At a chance meeting at Studio 54, Phillip eventually married Sandy McCullough, a malnourished coke dealer with a penchant for roller rinks and Twinkies.

In the early 1980’s, Phillip divorced Sandy after finding out she was, in actuality, a castrated man with hair extensions. Seeking fame in showbiz, the recovering alcoholic Phillip scored a role as a Storm Trooper in The Empire Strikes Back. Moving to Hollywood to pursue more potential acting gigs, Phillip was cast as "Restaurant Goer #2" in Sixteen Candles. He was especially noted for taking Molly Ringwald's virginity. On the set of Evil Dead II, Phillip -- a Deadite extra -- met Cindee Monahan. After a 72-hour, relapsed, drinking and drug binge, the two wed in a Las Vegas casino. A Liberace impersonator was a witness.

In the early to late 90’s, Phillip noticed the boy band phenomenon and decided to start his own group. At the age of 67, his group "Hi Five Come Alive" was considered less than a success; they received a European Grammy for "Best Album of the Year."

Cindee eventually divorced Phillip after discovering him in bed with 5 underaged Vietnamese prostitutes, two of whom were impregnated and became his fourth and fifth wife, respectively. When his fourth and fifth wife were deported, respectively, Phillip was at a crossroads. A single man again with nothing left to lose, Phillip decided to finally go to college and earn a degree in Hotel Management. Enrolled in the University of Illinois at Urbana Champaign, a dream (induced by eating too many Snickers bars) told Phillip to draw comics.

In 2049, after receiving much acclaim and admiration from the science community for discovering the element of "Funanium," Phillip Retuta died peacefully in his 7-story mansion from a gunshot wound to the liver. He was 126 and is survived by his on-and-off-again popstar girlfriend, Celeste Starshine, his brief homosexual fling with his accountant Gregory Peterson, his pet llama Miss Jojo McHuffington, and his many, many bastard children.

I wouldn't have gotten so far without the help of a lot of people, and since I am the very epitome of gentlemanessesss, I need to give credit where credit is due.

Special thanks go to...

...My old roommate Ken Lin, for hosting this and my other web-endeavours, the development of this site, and driving me to the DI office when I really needed a ride.
...My old editor Dave Chen, for your great deal of help with this site, bearing my annoying questions, and for giving this poor Filipino kid a decent paying job for two years. I owe you, like, a hundred beers.
...Zachary Campillo, for your love and support, and nuturing and encouraging my creativity. You're one of the best friends anyone can ever have.
...My fellow cartoonist Pat Doran, for being a well of artistic inspiration and damned quirkiness. Though we were comic buddies, you were like a boss and rode my ass like a CEO on a Tawainese whore; I thank you for pushing me to work when all I wanted to do was play PS2. We gotta collaborate.
...Suz Freerksen, for your kind words and your open ear. You've helped me through some of the roughest times, but most of all you were more than willing to check out my work every time I bugged you!

I want to thank my friends and partners in comic-crime: Matt Yurkanin, Matt Vroom, Jake Angel, Oliver Chang, and Joe Martin.

Muchas gracias goes out to the friends who've supported me and have gladly aided me in running a few of the sites: Jeff Peterson, Aaron Colter, Sara Kass, Caroline Mitgang, Jenna Cler, Allan DePaz, Alan Kaplan (dice later?), and Lindsey Billings.

I'd like to thank the academy and the ever-growing list of people whom most of my characters are based on. You know who you are...!

Lastly, I want to give a HUGE thanks to all the fans and readers. You guys inspire me to entertain, and I'll continue to do what I love doing until the masses tell me to stop (or I die; whatever comes first).

Sausage-Fest is an independent comic and has in no way any direct association with the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, it's faculty and employees, and facilities. Likewise, Sausage-Fest has no association with any other campuses, celebrities, public figures, products, and television shows. Sausage-Fest cannot be reproduced on a large-scale level without the expressed or written consent of Phillip Retuta. All original characters, design elements, and written material is the property of Phillip Retuta. Any questions, comments, and complaints can be directed here. Thank you, and goodnight!